Majoring in Forbidden Fruit
by Jameka Denise
Summary: This is an AU Swan Queen story, Regina is the professor, Emma the student. Can't summarize the story without giving everything away so read please! It'll be explained in the first chapter. Swan Queen is end game, if you want fluffy, immediate Swan Queen sorry this isn't where you wanna be. :)
1. The Mistake Was Made

She watched the flash of thigh appear and disappear as the brunette olive-skinned woman moved across the front of the room. There was an air of regalness about her that was both intimidating and arousing. She commanded attention and respect as she lectures about the inconsistencies of media coverage. The blonde could hear the words but they didn't stick, they weren't registering. She knew she should be paying attention; probably even taking notes but her mind was preoccupied. Her mind wandered; flashes of tantalizing thigh spurring her mind on its dangerous path. Thoughts of tongue and teeth, lips and hips plagued her mind. Soft sighs and the feel of skin beneath her finger nails teased her. She bit her lip and shifted in her seat; attempting to sooth the throb between her legs. It had been too long since she'd pleased or been pleased.

"Class dismissed."

The sound of shuffling supplies, the closing of laptops and whispered words were heard as people vacated the room. Some smiled and waved at the professor as she stacked papers at her desk. Emma sighed, being pulled from the recesses of her mind and began to pack her bag.

"You stay Ms. Swan."

Emma paused in the middle of packing her bag and looked at her professor who didn't expound on why she was to stay after class. Emma looked to her left to see Killian still sitting in his seat next to her. He raised an eyebrow at her but she merely rolled her eyes and shrugged. He chuckled and shook his head while putting his Mac in its case. She finished putting her notebook and mechanical pencils in the bag and turned back to the professor, waiting for the dark haired woman to address her.

"Mr. Jones"

The brunette motioned towards the door with her eyes and then looked back at him. He then looked to Emma who shrugged but nodded, he spared her a sympathetically glance before grabbing his bag and making his way out of the classroom. At the sound of the door closing the olive-toned woman spoke,

"Ms. Swan"

She sat perched on her own desk a sly smile on her lips, a shudder ran down Emma's spine at the sound of her name coming from her professor. There was a glint of something in her eyes and Emma took a deep breath.

"Dr. Mills."

Emma said grabbing her backpack, as she rose from her seat moving towards the desk that her professor sat on. With each step her arousal grew. She needed to get out of this room and fast. Her need to be touched was growing quickly.

"Was there something I could do for you?"

Regina raised a manicured eyebrow at the blonde student who had failed to pay attention to the second half of her lecture. The blonde had seemed to lose interest towards the middle of class and never deemed the lecture important enough to tune back in. This annoyed Regina more than anything, she'd taken time to plan out the lecture and how to execute it in a way that was most beneficial to her students and yet, her efforts were unappreciated and ignored.

"Do you intend to zone out of all my lectures, or was today just a special occasion?"

The annoyance was evident in the brunette's tone. Emma bit her lip and took a deep breath and released it slowly through her nose. She then chuckled and ran her fingers through her hair.

"Did you find something humorous about my question, Ms. Swan?"

Emma merely shook her head and looked at the board with notes on it that she had failed to notice during the lecture. She recognized some of the names and cases mentioned but she knew she'd missed most of the lecture and notes.

"There's a lot on my mind, Dr. Mills. I assure you, it will not happen again."

A smirk painted crimson red lips and Emma's core vibrated almost painfully. Emma took in the sight before her; Dr. Mills wore a pencil skirt that stopped above her knees, a cream colored silk blouse, and a red camisole underneath. The top three buttons of the blouse were open and Emma grinned secretively at the olive skin that peeked out. Clearing her throat, she looked quickly away from her instructor, making a note to text Graham or Ruby when she was done with this meeting. Either would help alleviate this tension between her thighs.

"That's something I've heard before."

Regina sighed and rose from her spot on the desk. She smiled at her student as the younger girl's eyes roamed her well toned frame.

"Ms. Swan, I would greatly appreciate it if when you came to class you'd actually _come_ to class. Get the notes from one of your classmates and I'll see you next class; hopefully you'll be here both in body and mind. If you are unable to do both I see no reason for you to continue to attend _this_ class or _any_ other class I teach."

With that said Regina walked into her office and closed the door. Emma glowered at the retreating form, her temper flaring at the way her professor seemingly dismissed her. She didn't doubt that Dr. Mills was capable of banning her from any more of her classes but that didn't detour her from wanting to confront the woman; she wasn't one to hold her tongue. She set her backpack down on the desk and moved towards the door, not being bothered with knocking, she walked in and let the door slam behind her.

"I was under the impression that we were done, Ms. Swan."

Regina tilted her head to the side as she spoke, watching the younger woman seem to quake with an array of emotions. Regina rolled her eyes and stood, walking around her desk to stand in front of Emma.

"Ms. Swan, is there something you need or are you just standing here to waste my time? In case you've forgotten or it simply slipped your mind while you were daydreaming, your class handed in case studies that I would like to start grading. "

"I didn't appreciate the way you spoke to me. I don't like being threatened."

Emma's tone was firm and it was clear that she was not happy. Regina smiled at the young woman, pursing her lips before continuing,

"I don't appreciate you ignoring more than half my lecture and I made no threats Ms. Swan, I simply stated facts. If you cannot pay attention there is no reason for you to be here, there are many qualified students who would love to have your seat."

Emma raised an eyebrow at her words and she bit back a snarl,

"I pay tuition at this university just like everyone else. I do all your assignments, turn in all your papers, pass all your tests. I do my part as a student. Your need to "_state facts"_ is bullshit. Try it with someone who doesn't know any better."

Regina narrowed her eyes at the student standing before her, not appreciating the tone the blonde was taking,

"As far as papers go, I've read better, and as far as you go Ms. Swan," Regina paused stepping into the blonde's personal space, and looked Emma up and down before giving a sarcastic chuckle, "I've had better." Regina motioned toward the door,

"Good day Ms. Swan"

Regina said, effectively dismissing her student. She turned to once again to take her seat behind the desk when she felt a firm hand on her wrist. She looked up aghast as she was pulled flush against the younger blonde. She looked up to see fire dancing in those emerald eyes.

"Bullshit," Emma sneered, eyes narrowed.

"Unhand me, Ms. Swan," Regina spat, as she attempted to free herself from the pale fingers wrapped around her wrist. The two women glared at one another, neither wanting to back down.

"Ms. Swan, you will—"

Emma's lips silenced the threat before it could be voiced. She held Regina captive in the embrace as her lips moved angrily against the brunette's. Her hands roamed freely; haughtily over the toned frame of her professor. Angry caresses were maddeningly arousing as the two women got lost in one another.

Nimble tanned fingers slid through blonde tresses, scraping at sensitive flesh, the desire to feel driving her on. The touch of a slick tongue breaking through the barrier of crimson painted lips caused a feral groan to leave her lips. She held on tightly, her center pulsating with a need she had yet to feel in quite some times.

The battle to claim and tame the other woman was warring; the blonde, too stubborn to back down while the professor struggled with her need to control everything. Neither wanted to recede or concede, both having something they felt they needed to prove. The need for air soon overtook them both and they broke the kiss.

Heated gusts of breath tickled Emma's cheek pulling her from the spell she seemed to be under. She took a step back, distancing herself from the dark haired woman who stood disheveled before her. She watched the woman's chest rise and fall rapidly. When she finally made eye contact, she couldn't repress the groan that rumbled deep in her throat. Regina's lust was on full display.

Regina closed the space between the two women and a frenzied kiss ensued. Little time was wasted; she immediately felt the swipe of a tongue against her bottom lip. Without a second thought, she allowed the blonde entry. Once again their tongues met and danced the dance of forgotten lovers.

Emma's fingers gripped at short brunette locks, pulling them, causing the other woman's neck to be exposed. Her kisses slipped from supple lips to the exposed throat. Her tongue flicked over the rapid pulse point before she closed her mouth around it, suckling hard.

A growl of sorts erupted from Regina. She gripped the blonde's head, holding her in place as wondrous sensations slid up and down her spine before pooling between her thighs. Her hands flexed, needing something to hold on to, she needed to ground herself, or she was sure she'd fly away or melt; melting was more accurate.

She gasped lightly when she felt her rear being grouped and kneaded. To add more surprise, Emma bent her knees and lifted the brunette. She wrapped her long legs are her student's waist as her lips moved to cover the blonde's. Emma nipped at her bottom lip, not so gently, pulling a soft moan from the other woman.

She moved across the office, placing her professor atop the desk the woman had previously sat behind. Emma surged forward deepening the kiss as Regina freed her from her leather jacket. The kissing neither slowed nor stopped as Emma pulled Regina closer, placing herself closer to the older woman's heated core. Regina's hands roamed over toned abs and gripped firm biceps. Emma's tongue caressed Regina's, pulling a moan from deep within the woman. Her hands fisted Emma's tank top as the desire burned her from the inside out

Regina soon pulled away from the heated kiss to take a deep breath. She looked up, locking eyes with the blonde. She watched, with hooded eyes, as Emma moved with calm precision to unbuttoned her blouse. They held blazing eye contact as Emma carefully undid all the buttons on the silk blouse. Her hands slowly ghosted over the soft camisole causing Regina's head to fall back.

This was taken as an invitation by Emma and she latched on to the exposed skin leaving a heated trail. She placed gently kisses near Regina's ear before traveling slowly down the column of the olive toned woman's throat. Her kisses then travel to the soft exposed skin peaking out above the thin material of Regina's camisole.

Taking care, the blonde pushed the silky material of Regina's blouse from her shoulders leaving open mouth kisses on the smooth skin there before once again her attention was called to the tantalizing skin above heaving breast. She dipped her tongue into the valley between Regina's breasts.

Regina's lips parted in a 'O' shape and she arched her back towards the woman standing between her thighs. She bit her lip as the throbbing between her thighs bordered on uncomfortable due to the skilled tongue.

She slipped her legs from around the blonde's slight waist as an expert mouth moved upward back towards her neck. Regina gasped when she felt lips latch onto her pulse point. A soft sound escaped Regina's throat as Emma's tongue flicked across the sensitive skin. Her head fell back as Emma continued her ministrations on the tender flesh of her neck.

Regina pulled away slightly, her breathing ragged. Emma looked up, confusion evident in her eyes. Regina didn't speak, only took the woman's lips with her own. She pulled the blonde's bottom lip into her mouth, suckling softly causing a soft moan to come for the other woman.

Emma offered up her tongue in place of her bottom lip and Regina took it hungrily.

She allowed her hands to once again explore; caressing hefty breast. She smiled at the slight intake of breath she caused before allowing her hands to travel even lower, until they rested on the professor's thigh. Emma pushed the fabric of the skirt up around Regina's hips and brought both her hands to rest on the woman's parted thighs.

Regina's kisses grew in intensity as Emma drew lazy circles on her inner thigh. Her teeth sunk into Emma's bottom lip as a delicious chill sprinted down her spin. Her thighs began to shake and she whimpered softly, her need overpowering her willpower.

Hearing the soft sound Emma was merciful and moved her hand towards the laced covered core. She slowly broke the kiss and watched warm brown eyes flutter open, desire pooled there like melted candle wax. She used the tip of her tongue to teasingly lick Regina's top lip as she toyed with her panty line all the while watching the brunette's face, enjoy the sheer pleasure that radiated from it.

Regina's hips bucked as Emma's fingers came in contact with her lace covered heat center. She looked into the eyes of the blonde; conveying her need to be touched, filled; fucked.

Emma's eyes darkened at the pure, unadulterated desire prominent in the woman sitting before her. Her intention was to tease and taunt the woman, make her beg and plead but those thoughts evaporated due to the sight before her. She held eye contact as she hooked her fingers around the waist band of laced panties. Regina lifted herself slightly, allowing Emma to slip them off. She dropped them unceremoniously and took in the sight before her. Olive toned cheeks were flushed a light pink and her chest rose and fell in an uneven pattern. Emma looked in her eyes as she slowly slid two fingers inside of her.

Regina gasped lightly and bit her bottom lip, as she kept her eyes trained on Emma. She leaned in to capture thin lips and moaned in the woman's mouth when a third finger was slipped inside of her. She wrapped her arms around the blonde and pulled her closer to her. She sucked on her bottom lip before she broke the kiss. A moan ripped through her as she felt a fingertip tease her bundle of nerves.

"I missed you"

Emma whispered against the brunette's lips while she moved in and out of her. Regina fought against the haze so she could see those emerald eyes. Truth and nostalgia shone in those eyes.

"Regina…"

The dark hard woman gasped at the sound of her name and bit her lip. She closed her eyes and rocked her hips gently against the hand between her legs. Regina needed more, Emma's pace was slow almost teasing.

"Emma…"

It was said softly, nearly a whimper and it stirred something deep inside the blonde woman, but she didn't change her pace. She moved her fingers deeper but not faster, dragging an almost animalistic grunt from Regina. She watched the vein in Regina's forehead become prominent and she leaned in near the woman's ear.

"Tell me you missed me too."

Regina licked her lips and groaned deeply. She opened her eyes as Emma pulled away from her ear and looked into her eyes, knowing she couldn't utter the words the blonde so desperately wanted to hear, but knowing that is was indeed true. She had missed the blonde terribly but admitting it to the other woman would cause too much pain, so she bit her lip and enjoyed the feel of Emma's touch while it lasted.

"Regina…"

Regina mewled but held her resolve, even as the words danced on her tongue, she took her bottom between her teeth and stared at Emma, emotions warring deep inside her and she knew that Emma could see them, but the younger woman didn't speak. Regina gasped and moaned as she felt fingers curl inside her, beckoning her to her peak. She gripped the edge of the desk and enjoyed the climb.

Her body rocked on it's on accord against Emma's hand. Their faces were close; they were breathing each other's air. Regina grabbed the back of Emma's neck and pulled her close, she kissed her with fervor. Emma's free hand wrapped around Regina's waist pulled her closer, causing her fingers to go deeper.

"_Emma_"

Emma felt slick muscles contract around her fingers at her name slipped from Regina's lips. She watched Regina's face as the dark haired woman began to ascend towards her peak. Her eyes were squeezed shut as her tongue swiped against her bottom lip before she took that very lip between her teeth once again. Her body thrust recklessly against Emma's hand.

Regina's arms fell from around Emma's neck and gripped the edge of the desk. Emma moved in and sunk her teeth into a soft skin at Regina's throat and the woman screeched as her body began to spasm. Her hips buckled against Emma's hands and her mouth fell open and Emma's name once again danced off her tongue.

Emma placed a soft kiss to the angry red mark that appeared where her teeth had sunken into olive toned skin and she moved her fingers in and out of Regina slowly, coaxing her through her orgasm. Her strokes were soft; beckoning her to return to the present; to the moment.

Regina's breaths rushed from her irregularly as she attempted to calm her racing heart but to no avail. Her body hummed with satisfaction as she came down from her high. She licked her lips and a small smile skirted across her lips.

She flexed her fingers before combing them through her hair. She willed her breathing to return to normal, by counting her heart beats mentally. Once her breathing returned to some semblance of normality she allowed her eyes to drift open to see emerald eyes shining with confidence and mirth.

She gave the woman a smirk of her own as she pulled her close, capturing her lips. She moved quickly, unbuttoning and unzipping the blonde's skinny jeans. She didn't have the patience that Emma displayed, it had been far too long since she'd touched the blonde and she wasn't going to wait. She worked her hand down the front of her jeans and before Emma could say anything, Regina's fingertip was making small circles around her engorged nub.

Emma's knees buckled at the sheer intensity and lack of finesse of the moment. She could see in Regina's eyes that she was hungry for this moment and she wasn't going to stop until she got the desired result. Her knees felt like jelly but Regina was there to catch and hold her up.

She turned the blonde so that Emma's back was against her chest and continued her assault. She set a rhythm of sorts, alternating between moving her fingertip in circles and rubbing her clit vigorously. Regina would get near the edge and pulled her back only to take her to the edge once more.

Emma's hand grabbed Regina wrist as her hips rolled against the expert fingers that were quickly calling forth her orgasm. Soft, needy sounds escaped Emma's parted lips as full lips and a skilled tongue wreaked havoc on her neck and ear.

Regina's free hand moved under the blonde's tee shirt and traced over the sculpted muscles of Emma's abs as they tightened from her ministrations. A smile painted full lips as she moved them to the shell of Emma's ear.

"I want you to come for me dear."

As if no choice was given, Emma's body trembled with the force of her orgasm as she repeated Regina's name like a sacred chant. Regina simply held her as Emma experienced the beautiful moment. Her breathing was ragged and she struggled to stay upright, but it was ok, because in that moment she was safe in Regina's arms.

She soon felt her body began to calm and her heart rate slowly returned to normal. Neither woman spoke as the weight of what they'd just done registered. Regina's hold tightened around the blonde as she felt Emma tense in her arms. Neither woman spoke and a silent tear slid down the brunette's cheek as she felt Emma pull away from her.

Emma kept her back to Regina as she fought the tears that threatened to fall. She sighed, picked up her jacket and slid her arms into it. She then buttoned and zipped her jeans. She bit her lip and took a deep breath before she turned to look at the other woman.

Regina stood before her, silent tears moving down her flushed cheeks but she refused to look at the blonde woman. She'd fixed her skirt and was attempting, to no avail, to button her blouse. Emma moved to stand in front of her and batted her hands away gently.

Regina couldn't look at her, fresh tears formed and she cursed the strong emotions that were running rampant within her.

"This shouldn't have happened."

It was whispered gently, not regret but sad knowing. Regina looked down to gauge the blonde's reaction to the words she'd spoken but there were none. Emma didn't pause in her efforts to redress Regina. Emma knew that she was attempting to put on a strong face. So she simply nodded as she finished buttoning the blouse. She looked up at the dark haired woman with a sad smile before leaning in and capturing Regina's lips, lingering only for a moment.

"I know."

Emma kissed the woman again, allowing their tongues to dance and them to bask in the taste of one another. To enjoy all that they used to be and all that they never would be again. She slowed the kiss to simple pecks before pulling away from the dark haired woman. She sighed and closed her eyes as Regina caressed her cheek and she covered the hand with her own. They stood like that, enjoying their parting moment, before Emma began backing away, their fingers still intertwined.

"Have a nice day Dr. Mills"

Regina's eyes shun with unshed tears,

"You too, Ms. Swan"

Emma nodded and moved towards the door, her fingers slipping from between Regina's. She didn't look back, no matter how badly she wanted to. She opened the door and closed it gently. She leaned against the closed door for a moment, allowing herself to experience the pain of what she'd just done. She then cleared her throat, grabbed her backpack and left the classroom.


	2. I Miss You

Hello, sorry for the wait guys. I was planning a trip to Chicago and a lot was going on. But I'm back now :) I want to thank everyone who clicked the follow and favorite button, it means a lot to me. Thank you my two reviewers. Reviews are welcome, so please don't be shy. Tell me if you love it, or hate. Thoughts, comments, criticism. Tell me what you want to see, I'm open to suggestions.

Here's Chapter 2, hope you like it!

~Jem

* * *

Regina stared at the door for what seemed like hours before she snapped out of her trance. She brought her fingers to her lips savoring the taste of Emma that lingered there. There was a part of her that was completely sure that this entire ordeal had been a figment of her imagination and she'd just wasted over an hour fantasizing about Emma Swan, but the sight of her La Perla underwear on the floor erased such notion. She and Emma Swan had fucked in her office. She couldn't lie and say that they'd made love,she'd made love to Emma enough times to know what that felt like. What had transpired in her office had been far from love making. She wants to say that it meant nothing but she knew that it meant everything. She had watched and yearned for Emma from a far for months. Even though she saw the her three times a week, it wasn't enough. There may as well have been an ocean between the two and rightfully so.

Regina called her brooding to a pause, she knew she wouldn't be able to stop the onslaught of emotions and thoughts but right now she needed to focus, she needed to put on her _Dr. Mills, I'm the HBIC _façade and get through the rest of her day.

In an attempt to get herself together she went to her fridge and grabbed a San Pellegrino and took a drink. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath attempting to calm her nerves. She failed, her mind wondered, once again, to the blonde woman who held so much of her heart that it was physically painful.

She knew she shouldn't have baited the younger woman. She could lie to Emma and say she was just doing her job but she knew how to make the younger woman tick; she'd had almost two years of practice. Knowing the other well as well as she did, she knew it was only a matter of time before something, happened. She did not foresee that something being her being ravished on her desk but the blonde had reacted; lost control, and even though she enjoyed it immensely in the moment, now she was alone in her office, with the heavy scent of her own sex and a heady reminder of all she once had.

She sighed and shook her head, moving to retrieve her lacy panties from the center of her office floor. She was obviously out of practice, she didn't have a spear pair, something she never left the house without when she and Emma were together.

_When she and Emma were together_

She shook her, banishing the painful thought for a time and place where she could afford to wallow in that pain. Slipping her panties into her purse she moved to once again take the seat behind her desk. She looked at the slight mess but didn't allow the memories that threatened to rear their heads. She merely straightened up the mess and reached for a stack of papers that needed to be graded.

She prided herself on her fair grading system, grading without prejudice or bias based on the student, and even while her and Emma were in an intimate relationship the young woman earned every grade she received, often times having to work harder due to Regina's fear of showing favoritism. They had spent a many of nights and mornings arguing about a B+ or an A- because Emma thought her work deserves more. She always joked that it should be easier to pass when you're involved with your teacher not harder. Regina smiled at the thought and the smile held due to the intelligence of her once lover and couldn't help but feel proud of the young woman and how she'd grown as a student.

* * *

"Are you sure Ms. Swan" Kathryn asked as she printed out the form. Emma only nodded not making eye contact with the woman. Kathryn eyed the young woman wearily but chose to bite her tongue and not meddle.

"This is something that is often approved, but you have to get your adviser, Professor Glass and Dr. Mills to sign it before the transfer can be approved." Again Emma nodded and took the form from the woman's hands.

"Is there anything else I can get for you Ms. Swan?" Emma smiled and shook her head before leaving the office. Knowing that Dr. Hopper, her adviser, would want to discuss why she'd want to change classes in the middle of the semester, she opted to get him out of the way first. She moved towards his office, trying to not think about why she wanted to switch classes. She knew she couldn't afford to indulge in what she'd done with Regina right now. That was something for her to pine over in the privacy of her apartment. She shook her head and turned down the hall Dr. Hopper's office was on. She saw his door was open and she walked in.

"Hey Pongo" Emma said as the Dalmatian sat up and walked towards her. She sat in one of the chairs in the office and scratched behind Pongo's ears. She smiled down at the rather large dog and cooed at him.

"Hello Emma"

"Hey Dr. Hopper, I need you to sign this form." She handed him the form and hopped that the direct approach would get her out of a lecture but she knew she was wrong. She looked up and saw his brows were furrowed as he looked down at the paper.

"You want to transfer classes in the middle of the semester? Better yet, you want to transfer out of the Department chair's class to transfer into an Assisstant Professor's class?"

"Dr. Hopper—"

"Emma, you're at the top of your class and Dr. Mills is the department chair, I don't think switching in the middle of the semester is wise, or even possible."

Emma sighed and slumped in her chair. She knew she was asking for a lot and she knew that it wasn't actually possible but she had to try. There was no way she could actually go to class and look at Regina after what she'd done.

"Go talk to Professor Glass and Dr. Mills, I think that you should try to work out whatever the issue is because a switch in the middle of the semester isn't something that is done often without getting Mr. Gold involved. Maybe we can find an alternative."

Emma sat up and looked at him expectantly, "If you can get it approved by both Dr. Mills and Mr. Gold, you can apply for an independent study. You won't have to go to class, you will just have to turn in your work via e-mail, being that midterms were last week you won't have to go to class until finals week."

Emma thought this over, she'd still have to be in contact with Regina but she didn't have to see her. And seeing her was the problem. "I like that idea."

"It's only a back up, if Dr. Mills doesn't sign the transfer form. I'll print you the independent study form."

Emma nodded and looked down at Pongo, who had gotten rather comfortable next to the chair she was sitting in. She gave him one last scratch behind the ears before taking the offered form and leaving the office throwing a "Thanks Dr. H" over her shoulder.

She looked down at both forms in her hand and decided to not even try with the transfer form and moved back towards Regina's office. She walked pass Professor Glass' office and heard Regina's voice. She paused and took a deep breath. She tried to still her beating heart but being that she had, not even two hours prior, fucked the woman, she couldn't help the heat that rose to her cheeks. Pushing her nerves aside she knocked on the door.

"Come in"

His voiced seemed strained and she took note of the fact that Regina was sitting behind his desk while he sat on the opposite side. She felt bad for him, she knew when it came to the professor's in the department Regina was a bit of a hard ass. Regina didn't look up as the door opened assuming it was one of Sidney's students.

"Ms. Swan, what can I do for you?"

Regina's eyes snapped up as she looked at the young woman who had been, roughly two hours ago, standing between her legs fucking her with no abandon. She felt her core moisten at the mere thought of what took place on her office desk. Emma always did have that effect on her.

Emma held her gaze for a brief moment before turning to Professor Glass, "I'm actually here to see Dr, Mills. I was headed to her office when I heard her in here."

"What can I do for you Ms. Swan?"

"I would prefer to discuss this in your office Dr. Mills, if that alright."

Regina tilted her head to the side and took in the blonde before her. She stood and moved from behind the desk, "Sidney I'll be back shortly."

She once again turned to look at Emma, "Shall we Ms. Swan?"

"Do you really want to go to my office Emma?" She asked after they'd walked a safe distance away from Sidney's office. Emma chuckled and shook her head no. "We could go to the café, and discuss whatever it is you would like to discuss."

Emma nodded and they walked in silence towards the café. Regina stole glances at Emma when she wasn't looking, she seemed deep in thought and it made Regina slightly nervous. She knew they'd have to discuss what happened but she wasn't prepared for it to happen now, while she could still taste Emma on her lips, and feel her phantom touches.

They entered the café and Emma went to grab a table in a secluded corner while Regina went to Starbucks. Emma put both forms on the table as Regina came back with a bear claw and hot coco with cinnamon for Emma and a coffee and apple pie for herself.

"You remember?" Emma gestures to the tray, Regina merely smiled and nodded,

"I still have cinnamon sticks in my cabinet at home" she chuckled, and looked down at the table. She saw the pink form and the smile fell from her lips. She cleared her throat and looked up at Emma, her _Dr. Mills, I'm the HBIC façade _firmly in place.

"Ms. Swan , you do realize that a transfer in the middle of the semester is not something that I can approve."

Emma rolled her eyes at Regina, "Hey put the claws away, I don't want talk to _Dr. Milss HBIC_, I want to talk to Regina ok?"

Regina smirked at her and sighed, "Ok Ms. Swan"

"Don't call me that." she stuck her tongue out before taking a bite of her bear claw. Regina smiled, she missed this, them being carefree and silly and just themselves. She took a sip of her coffee and waited for Emma to start talking.

"I know I can't transfer in the middle of the semester."

"I don't see why you feel the need to anyway."

Emma looked pointedly at her and Regina sighed, "Ok, so what do you want to do Emma?"

"I want so many things Regina, I want what happened in your office not to be a big deal, I want us to not be strained, Regina I want to be with you again."

Regina leaned across the table and took Emma's hand, "We can do that Emma. Today doesn't have to be a big deal, we don't have to be strained, we can be together again."

Emma shook her head and Regina could see the tears shinning in those stormy green eyes.

"I would like to apply for an independent study. I would still be in your class, I would just not have to come to class. I wouldn't—"

"Have to see me." Regina whispered, finishing Emma's sentence.

"Yea, so can you just sign this and give it to Mr. Gold so he can sign it."

"It would only have to go to Mr. Gold if I didn't believe the applicant can handle the freedom of an independent study. I know you'll be fine."

Emma gave Regina a pen for her to sign it with. Emma watched how Regina's hand shook slightly and how when she handed the paper and pen back she didn't look at her at all. She looked past her, and Emma could see the tears swimming in her eyes. She sighed, this was her fault. She'd done this to the brunette woman sitting in front of her. She'd opened a wound that she can only assume was trying to heal. Emma couldn't stand the sight of Regina broken and in pain. She didn't want to continue the cycle of them hurting each other. She couldn't deal with knowing that was no better than Regina in this moment; her selfishness causing the other woman pain. She grabbed her backpack and the independent study form and left.

Regina watched her head towards the restroom, she took a deep breath and stood from her chair. She emptied the tray and followed the blonde.

She walked in the bathroom and and saw Emma at the sink, rinsing her face. She turned the lock and took a step forward, "Emma"

Emma looked up and stared at Regina through the mirror. She didn't say a word; she just looked at the woman. The woman who had knocked down all her walls and showed her so many things, the first woman she'd given her body to, the first woman to ever break her heart.

"Dr. Mills—"

Regina shook her head, placing her hand on her head.

"Don't 'Dr. Mills' me, Emma. You said you didn't want to talk to her, you wanted Regina, here I am Emma. I'm the woman that you, not even two hours ago, had your way with."

Emma turned to face the dark haired woman, with tear rimmed eyes. She didn't speak; she simply stared at Regina as the tears slipped from her eyes. She made no noise, no long sob ringing out; just silent tears and the sight broke Regina's heart.

"I made a mistake; I shouldn't have done what I did. It was stupid. I'm sorry."

Regina looked shocked and taken aback, by the blonde's admission, she opened her mouth to speak but words failed her. She looked in Emma's eyes and saw nothing but pain,

"You made….you made a mistake? No, you did not make a mistake. You meant it. You….you touched me Emma and you kissed me like…like you used to. That was no mistake. "

Regina moved closer to the younger woman, standing directly in front of her, she reached out a shaky hand to caress the younger woman's cheek. Emma sighed as the tears continued to fall.

"Regina please."

She begged her. Emma knew she could not go down this road again. She had given the woman nearly two years of her life and she couldn't begin to explain the pain she felt over the fact that they were over. Even though she desperately wanted to, she could not allow herself to be pulled back in by the beautiful brunette standing before her.

"Emma, you can't walk away from me again. Please, I know that things weren't the best, I know I lied to you and I should have been honest but…..I need you."

Regina's lower lip quivered as she whispered the words to the young woman. Regina knew she had wronged the blonde but at the time she had no choice. Things were different now, she was different now. She moved in closer to the blonde until the two women were breathing the same air.

"Please Regina, don't"

Emma's tears flowed freely as she begged Regina not to do the inevitable. Regina ignored the plea and captured Emma's mouth. Pulling the woman against her, needing to feel all she could before the moment was over. She drowned in the kiss, lost herself in the softness of Emma's lips and the familiarity of the arms wound tightly around her. She reveled in the emotions she felt behind the kiss; the passion and love that flowed off Emma in waves. Emma's fingers tangled in her hair and she could feel the tears still flowing from the blonde's eyes.

Emma pulled away gently breaking the spell that seemed to wrap them up whenever they were this close to one another. Emma gave Regina a watery smile before turning back to the mirror and turning on the water to wipe her face again. She sighed as she looked at the broken woman standing behind her Emma shook her head.

"I can't do this again Regina…..I can't, I want to, but I can't."

"Emma, I know it was cruel and stupid to keep it from you but you know now."

"Not because you were honest Regina!"

Regina couldn't say a word as she remembered the day that everything fell apart; the day when she broke Emma's heart. She shoved the memory away; not wanting to dwell on the pain that day had caused both women.

"Emma I'm sorry."

"I know, but it's not enough"

"Emma..."

"I still love you Regina"

Regina's eyes grew wide and she just stared at Emma before she sprang into action. She grabbed the back of Emma's neck crushing their lips together. It was hard, frenzied, desperate. Regina clung to her, needing to be as close as she could. She backed Emma into the counter and the blonde gasped. Regina delved deeper into Emma mouth. Her tongue caressing Emma's, seducing her. She lifted Emma onto the counter and as if out of habit, Emma wrapped her legs around Regina.

Emma surged forward, taking control, taking all that she could before she allowed herself to come back to her senses. She enjoyed Regina's hands on her, she based in the feel of her tongue dancing with Regina's. She didn't think, she enjoyed the moment. She allowed herself to remember what they had and how perfect it was.

"Come back to me"

Regina whispered against Emma's mouth as the kiss began to come to an end. Emma nipped Regina's bottom lip and ran her tongue over it. She looked into soulful dark brown eyes and wanted to get lost. She kissed her gently.

"I can't"

They just stared at each other. The weight of Emma's admission hanging heavy in the air. Looking into Regina's eyes Emma longed to simply let the past go and be with her but, she couldn't. She could not accept that Regina didn't trust her enough to be honest with her. Emma had been used and lied to so many times in her life that she could not handle knowing that the first woman she truly let it and trusted, broke her. This helped her keep her resolve.

"Would you email me my assignments for the week"

Emma slipped off the counter, her body sliding against Regina's. She caressed her cheek before placing a gentle kiss on her lips. A tear slid Regina's cheek and Emma wiped it away. She then let her hand fall from Regina's cheek and moved towards the door.

"I miss you."

Regina whispered softly, catching the blonde off guard. Neither of the two women moved as the words hung in the air. Emma could feel Regina's desperation and she knew how hard it was for the older brunette to show this side of herself. Regina hated feeling weak and vulnerable, but she was showing Emma just how much she needed her and the blonde didn't know what to say or what to do. Emma had asked for this only hours earlier. She'd wanted to know if Regina missed her too, but hearing the truth and the pure need in those words caused a slew of emotions she was not prepared for. She pressed her hand against the bathroom door and took a deep breath. She sighed and before she could allow herself to fall any deeper into the abyss she unlocked the door and walked out of the bathroom leaving a tearful Regina to standing alone, taking in what just happened.


	3. Come Back to Me

Hey everyone. Omg you guys are great, lots of new followers and I hope everyone enjoys this chapter. Thank you for the reviews, you guys are awesome. I want to thank my amazing Beta who prefers to be a silent help. I love her still. Well, I'll stop rambling, enjoy chapter 3.

~Jem

* * *

Emma walked into her apartment in a bit of a daze. She honestly didn't recall driving home, as her mind was too occupied. Too many thoughts, too many emotions, and she knew sooner or later the dam would burst, she would break down and be virtually inconsolable. She wasn't looking forward to it, not in the slightest.

She tossed her backpack on the counter and went to the fridge to grab a beer in order to calm her nerves. She walked over to her couch, plopped down and took a long swig of the ale, the amber liquid leaving a familiar bitter taste in her mouth. She sighed and pulled her phone from her pocket, unlocked the device, and saw that she had a voicemail as well as a text message. She read the text message first.

_Hey Emma do you wanna get together tonight? It's been a couple weeks, and I've been thinking about you._

She sighed and called her voicemail,

_"Hey Em, don't order take out. I'm bringing home food from Granny's. _

Emma checked the time on the missed call and saw that it was about an hour ago. She went back to her text messages and told Graham that they could meet up some other time; she was busy tonight. She noticed her battery was dying so she put her phone on the charger and headed towards her bedroom. She pulled off her jacket and hung it in her closet, removed both her shirt and pants, and made her way to the bathroom. She groaned when she noticed Ruby's workout clothes in the middle of the floor next to the hamper. They had this discussion all the time. She sighed, knowing the brunette was never going to change. She put the clothes in the hamper and pressed play on the docked iPod before turning the hot water on full blast. Emma added a small amount of cold water and got under the spray.

The heat of the water felt like it was pulling the flesh from her bones but Emma didn't mind. She closed her eyes and allowed the scalding water to caress her skin as snippets of the day came back to her. Quick flashes of Regina's face, her lips, her legs. Her smile danced behind Emma's eyelids. She could hear Regina's voice in her head: the soft sounds she made morphing into her pleading words. She put her face under the falling water; trying to drown out the pain in Regina's voice. Emma's mind wandered back to a time when their relationship wasn't as complicated.

_Kisses._

_Touches. _

_Regina's weight pinning her comfortably to the bed, her curves like the sun warmed ocean._

_ Regina's soft, full lips blazing a trail down her sensitive flesh _

_Their bodies slick with sweat after frenzied sex._

_Regina's curves melting into her as the brunette lie sleeping._

_Her name hanging in the air like a prayer as Regina reached the precipice of pleasure._

_The inexplicable emotion that warmed her fully when hearing Regina utter 'I love you'_

The blonde's eyes shot open and she sucked in labored breathes. Her heart ached with the need for her former lover. Her body hummed with an ache unprecedented. She needed the woman's touch far more than any need she'd ever felt. She wanted to rip her heart from her chest because the pain of not having Regina in her life was so immense.

The thought of Regina caused such a war of emotions inside the younger woman. The brunette was so very loving and always seemed to know what Emma needed. She was kind and understanding; everything Emma wanted and needed in her life. She oftentimes found herself faced with more pleasure than she could ever imagine.

It would be false of Emma to say it was only the sex she missed—even though that was a glorious incentive—but the tenderness from simply lying together or watching movies together was missed as well. The sense of belonging with someone was a feeling she hadn't felt her entire life. Regina made Emma feel whole, and the last five months without the woman had proven to be torture. She put on a brave face in class but she made every effort to garner the woman's attention. It hardly mattered whether the attention in question was positive or negative, but in spite of her efforts, or perhaps because of them, the hole was never filled. Knowing how beautiful and full her life with Regina Mills was, she didn't know how to let go of the pain.

The blonde sighed and lathered her wash cloth. The scent of spiced apples—her guilty pleasure—filled her bathroom. She took a deep breath, inhaling the familiar scent. It was a heady feeling, being surrounded by something purely Regina. She didn't use the body wash often; only when she was struggling with being away from Regina. When she needed to feel closer to the older woman, she allowed herself a moment. A deliciously torturous moment to live in the past, in order to enjoy what she once had and what she didn't know how to have again.

Regina sat in her bed, her laptop resting on her lap, three different stacks of papers to her left. She logged onto Outlook and checked her email. She had one from the President of the college reminding her that he would be needing the list of honor society members in her department by the end of the November, a couple from student services, some from students requesting extra credit or inquiring about their grades (those she disregarded, preferring to discuss such matters in person). There were some from members in her department wondering about their next faculty meeting, and she made a mental note to send out a group message. Next, Regina opened up a blank document and began typing out the names of students she knew would be inducted into the Honor Society.

· _Dororthy Gale_

· _Elizabeth Turner_

· _Gilda White_

· _Astrid Nova_

· _Emma Swan_

Her fingers trembled as she finished typing Emma's name. She knew without a doubt Emma would be inducted, and she didn't need to see a list. She would probably be among a select few Juniors that were inducted. With Emma in mind, she went back to Outlook and composed a new email.

_Ms. Swan_

_When I return to campus tomorrow morning, I will file your paperwork for the independent study. I am unsure if you are aware but the workings of an independent study differ from the curriculum set up for the actual class. Usually the student in question meets weekly with the head of their majoring department to ensure the student is on task and hasn't fallen behind, but because this is a rather peculiar situation, I will allow you to appoint a professor in the department you would like to report to on a weekly basis. _

_Best Regards,_

_Dr. Regina Mills_

_Associate Professor_

_Political Science Department Chair_

Regina read over her email to ensure she was strictly professional and to the point. After reading it over twice she deemed it appropriate and sent it. She could feel emotional war brewing deep inside, but she wasn't ready to face it. She had entirely too much to get done and she couldn't think about today. She couldn't think about the sex, or the kisses, or the sounds. She couldn't think about Emma Swan. Not yet.

She placed her laptop to the side as she pulled out the exams from her Intro to Political Science class. Grabbing a red pen, she immersed herself in grading her papers. This was her least favorite class to teach. It was an option for general education so it was oftentimes a mix of students who actually cared and students who were just there for at least a C-. Even though she wasn't overly fond of teaching this class, there were perks. She was able to vet the potential young minds of the department. Not everyone came through her Intro class but those who did were equally blessed and cursed. Obviously having the head of the department tell you you've found your area of expertise is quite the accolade but on the flip side, hearing that you should run far from this department could be a traumatic affair, especially if your heart was set on majoring in Political Science. Alas, that was not her concern, for she didn't coddle. Coddling did not earn her the position of department chair.

As she was grading, she began to regret her decision of not bothering with crafting an answer key. She always thought of it as a waste of time being that she knew the answers to the quizzes and tests, for she wrote them. But now with a million and two things going through her mind, she was having a small amount of difficulty. With a sigh, she focused her thoughts on the task at hand. The multiple choice segment of the test was rather simple to grade due to the lack of leniency in the answer choices. The issue lay with the short answer questions. Between the fact that some of the students' handwriting was virtually illegible and the fact that they seemed to struggle with actually answering the questions, she felt a headache coming on.

She removed her glasses, placed them on her nightstand and rubbed her eyes tiredly. She'd made it through two classes and had one more to go. Regina eyed the other stack of exams and groaned, knowing she was only attempting to distract herself from allowing her mind to wander into dangerous territory. She pinched the bridge of her nose and willed her mind to stray away from such thoughts, to ignore what happened in her office and the way it felt to be with Emma again.

She glanced over at the clock: 11:32. She hadn't kept track of time, and the hour had grown later than she thought. She closed her laptop, then set it and all the exams on her desk. She turned her cell phone on to see she had four missed calls and a voicemail. Scrolling through her call log she realized that she wanted to speak with 2 of the 3 people who had attempted to contact her. She knew she should probably return the phone calls but the hour was late and it would be better to wait until morning. She decided to listen to the voicemail instead,

_"Hey, it's Kathryn. Emma Swan just left my office asking for a class transfer form from your class. What happened? Are you two back together? Call me." _

Regina sighed as she listened to the voicemail. Her friend sounded sincerely concerned, and she knew the other woman only had her best interests at heart, but she could not talk to anyone about Emma right now. It was too fresh, too raw. She made a mental note to arrange a lunch date with Kathryn to fill her in on the happenings.

She sat on edge of her bed staring off, her mind wandering, her thoughts surrounding one person. She sighed as she laid back, her head bouncing gently on her pillow. She closed her eyes but sleep did not come to her. She simply lay awake, reminiscing.

_"As is class protocol, Fridays are debate days. I need a controversial case that happened within the last decade. Mr. Smith, do not say the OJ Simpson case. I know how fond of it you are." _

_The class chuckled as Regina waited on a brave soul. "The State of Florida v. Casey Anthony." A few members in the lecture hall groaned and others rolled their eyes. Regina tilted her head to the side and pursed her lips in thought. It was a well known case and it was a matter of discussion in the Intro to Political Science class. _

_"Everyone should be well versed in this case. Thoughts?" _

_"She was stupid," someone spoke up, and the classed laughed. Regina simply rolled her eyes and cleared her throat. The room fell silent. _

_"She was found not guilty. Contrary to popular belief that means something in our justice system. José Baez did his job well and proved his case." _

_There were murmurs amongst the classroom but no one spoke up. Slight movement from the back of the room caught her attention. She watched as a pair of shades were pulled from blonde hair and placed back roughly. 'A sign of annoyance,' Regina mused. She shook her head, moved to look at the dark-haired young woman and raised her eyebrow,_

_"Continue, Ms. Gale."_

_ "Baez had a sound case and the prosecution didn't. There is no way to prove that she killed the child, especially being that there were only decomposed remains found. And as a mother she couldn't have—"_

_"You cannot honestly attempt to make an argument about how a mother would never do something like that, especially when Casey Anthony's mothering skills were questionable at best." _

_The entire room turned to look towards the direction of the voice__. Dorothy narrowed her eyes at the blonde student. Emma cleared her throat and stared back._

_"And you are?"_

_Regina asked, watching the young woman intently and seeing emerald eyes staring back at her. There was a bit of mirth shining in those brilliant green eyes. She arched an eyebrow at the young woman, waiting for an answer. _

_"Swan, Emma Swan." _

_Regina nodded, logging away the name to go with the face. "Please, continue Ms. Swan." _

_Emma nodded and turned her attention back to Dorothy. _

_"Caylee Anthony was found dead, and as you stated, bones were all that were found in a garbage bag near the Anthony residence. You wanted to speak on Casey Anthony's mothering skills, and yet the woman didn't shed a tear until the end of the trial neared, and even those were said to be simply for show. She was out, participating in the nightlife of the city while her daughter was supposedly missing. You claim José Baez had a sound case when all he was, in actuality, was an opportunist who capitalized on the prosecution's missteps. And your statement about having faith in the justice system,"-Emma shook her head and rolled her eyes- "that's impossible when the system is skewed and prejudiced. But back to the situation at hand: this was a controversial case and there are many opinions flying around. No one honestly knows what happened but Caylee and Casey Anthony and possibly the parents. Now, I won't be cliché and say that the woman got away with murder, but I will say she should not have been walking around free after the six week trial." _

_The class sat silent, stunned by Emma's words. A coy smile played along the blonde's lips as she looked at the dark haired woman standing at the front of the room. She stood composed and unbiased, but Emma could see something behind those dark eyes._

_"There wasn't enough evidence for the claims," Dorothy chimed in, and this garnered Emma's attention and caused her to scoff,_

_"There were over four hundred pieces of evidence. The prosecution just did not approach the case correctly."_

_"Well obvious—" _

_"The grandmother actually said the trunk of the vehicle smelled like a dead body."_

_As the debate continued, a smirk graced Regina's lips. The verbal sparring between Ms. Gale and Ms. Swan was interesting. The class seemed enthralled by the debate and Regina allowed it to continue. She watched the two participating parties, and she silently praised Emma for her poise. The blonde calmly delivered all her points concisely, her composure kept, while Dorothy raised her voice and made wild hand gestures. Emma easily rebutted Dorothy's claims and it was clear the brunette did not like it. _

_Regina could sense the tension rising in the room and decided, before Ms. Gale blew a blood vessel, to bring the friendly debate to a close. She cleared her throat, bringing attention to herself._

_"Ladies, thank you for participating in the debate. Class, do not forget to pull something from the New York Times for Monday's discussion. Your first case study is due a week from today, five pages, double spaced. I hope you all have started. Have a nice weekend."_

_The class packed their bags, and some talked about the paper, while others pointed to Emma and smiled or yelled comments at her about the debate, and the final few discussed their plans for the weekend. Regina's eyes were trained on a particular blonde who was taking her time putting her things away when Dorothy moved up the stairs in front of her desk. Regina arched her eyebrow at the short exchange. It seemed amicable but there was obviously no way for her to know, given the distance. Dorothy moved swiftly, grabbing her bag and giving Regina a small wave before leaving the classroom. _

_"Quite the display, Ms. Swan" _

_The young woman stopped mid-step and looked up at her professor, a little startled by the address. Regina watched her intently, seeing the way she quickly composed herself and moved with something akin to confidence to the front of the room. _

_"She's a know-it-all, and I don't like know-it-alls," __Emma commented with a smirk. _

_Regina gave a small smile and took in the sight before her. The young blonde was of athletic build, and she wore a red and black flannel, unbuttoned with a black sports bra beneath. Regina swallowed thickly at the toned abdomen muscles on display that gave way to denim shorts. Long, tanned legs escaped the shorts and the look was completed with a pair of Chucks, red. Regina's once over was quick; succinct. Even still, she raised her eyes to meet amused emerald ones._

_Regina cleared her throat gently, "Understandable, but I was surprised by how vocal you were, being that you have remained silent during previous classes."_

_Emma shrugged and hoisted her bag on her shoulder, licked her lips and smiled at her professor. She, unlike Regina, was not discreet in her once over. Her eyes slid over the professor, leaving a fiery trail in their wake. _

_Regina took a deep breath as she was assessed by the blonde. Her body reacted to the darkening of emerald eyes._

_"Obviously my silence fooled you. I was simply waiting for the right moment, and being that we're in week three I felt it was time to finally make myself known." Emma pulled her shades from her hair, and slid them onto her face. "Have a nice weekend, Dr. Mills."_

Regina sat up and ran her fingers through her hair. She moved to the edge of her bed and looked at her closet. The pull was strong; stronger than usual. She'd ignored the desire many nights in the past five months, but her resolve was pretty much depleted.

She stood and walked into her closet. She passed over the blazers, dress shirts, slacks and reached into the back left corner for her box of memories. Cliché as it was, she couldn't help but house the keepsakes. She pulled the small box from the shelf and backed out of the closet to her bed. She sat crossed legged on the bed and gently placed the box on her duvet.

After the romp in her office, and the emotional conversation in the ladies room, the hole that was left by Emma's departure throbbed painfully. She'd attempted to distract herself with work but was unsuccessful. Deep down she knew she wouldn't be, but as she'd heard Emma say often,

_"Nothing beats a failure but a try."_

Regina took a deep breath before opening the box. She didn't reach inside immediately. She couldn't. She needed to emotionally prepare herself for the onslaught of emotions that were sure to flow through her when she embarked on this mission. Her eyes already burned with unshed tears, and she began to rethink this stroll down memory lane. The thought was quickly thwarted as she began pulling photos from the box. A watery smiled painted her features as she flipped through them.

_Emma smiling widely_

_She and Emma in New York_

_Emma pouting_

_She and Emma in Boston_

_Emma sleeping_

_Emma sitting behind the wheel of her Mercedes_

_Emma in her garden_

_Emma standing.._

_Emma…._

The images began to blur due to how quickly Regina was flipping through them. Just flashes of blonde hair and emerald eyes were visible. Regina paused on the last photo. She and Emma were wrapped in a sweet embrace, their lips nearly touching. So much love and passion shone in those brilliant green eyes. Regina unconsciously traced the outline of their bodies in the photo. She smiled down at it as her tears raced down her cheeks. Placing the photo on her nightstand, propped up against her lamp, she made a mental note to get a frame for it.

She stacked the photos in a neat pile and peeked inside the box once more. She pulled out birthday and Valentine's Day cards, her fingers hovering over the raised words on one of them. Her hand shook as she opened the card.

_Hey beautiful,_

_I know you and your mom don't get along but I'm thankful for her, because she gave me the best thing in the world. She gave me you, on this day, 33 years ago. Words can't explain how happy I am about that._

_This past year with you has been beautiful and I'm happy to be spending your birthday with you. You are so beautiful, and I feel so lucky that I have you, and that we have each other. I've never felt for someone what I feel for you. I've never loved the way I love you and I feel like I never will again. _

_I love you. Happy Birthday_

Regina wiped the tears from her eyes as she read the card again. Her heart felt like it might explode from the pain. Reading Emma's words, reading how much she meant to the young woman, and remembering how she hurt the girl yanked painfully at her heart strings. She hated herself for the pain she'd caused, for ruining the one good thing she had in her life.

Regina placed the card aside and looked back into the box. There was only one item left. With shaking hands she pulled out the small, black, velvet box. A sob ripped through her as she slowly opened it. Inside was a beautiful ring. It was a silver intertwined triple band with an amethyst stone. Emma gave it to Regina for their second Valentine's Day together. The younger woman told her it was a promise ring, and the three intertwining bands meant their love, their happiness and their prosperity. She said she chose amethyst because she knew it was her favorite color, and the stone was said to have healing properties.

_"Just think of me as your healer. I'll heal you. I'll make sure all the pain goes away."_

Emma's words echoed in her head. Regina hadn't touched the ring since their break-up, because she'd always felt like wearing it was a betrayal of sorts. It was supposed to symbolize their love and she'd broken it. She'd ruined their relationship.

She removed the ring from the box, and with unsteady hands she slid it onto her right ring finger. The ring slid easily into place as if that was where it was meant to be. She smiled through the tears as the gem caught the light emanating from her bedside lamp. She vowed at that moment that she would wear the ring not as a reminder of what she'd done and how she'd ruined them, but as a reminder of the love the two women once shared and still had for one another.


	4. I Want To Move Forward!

*peaks out from behind my computer* Hi...I know I suck and you guys have been waiting for like a month. Don't hate me, a lot has been going on but hey guess what I'm back and I won't be going on hiatus any time soon and if I have to take a hiatus for school I won't do it without telling you first. There is some Red Swan, if that's not your cup of tea then skip the _Italics _and I'll brief you at the end. All mistakes are my own my beta will edit this later, sorry guys. Ok bye :) and enjoy this long awaited chapter.

~Jem

* * *

"I got you a cheeseburger, Em!" Ruby set the bags of food on the counter in the kitchen. "Emma!"

"What?"

Emma came out of the bathroom towel drying her hair, in a pair of sweatpants and a racer back tank top. She smiled at the sight of Ruby and made her way towards the kitchen where the food was.

"So as I said, I got you a cheeseburger with fri—"

She stopped mid-sentence and looked at Emma with a curious expression. She cocked her head to the side and watched Emma grab a plate and put her food on it. Emma walked past her again and she knew she hadn't been mistaken.

"Apples. You smell like apples. More importantly, you smell like that very expensive apple scented body wash that has been in your bathroom for like, seven months."

Emma sighed as she sat down. She shouldn't have used the body wash, not with Ruby coming home tonight, with her oddly strong sense of smell. Still, Emma knew the scent clung to her like a second skin, and it would be hard to miss even without the keen, wolf-like senses.

"Ruby…I—"

"Emma, what happened?"

Emma didn't speak. She just looked up at Ruby, her eyes saying all that her mouth couldn't.

"You didn't."

Emma was silent.

"You did. Oh shit, Emma."

Ruby came over to the sofa and sat down next to the blonde. She didn't say anything, just waited for whenever Emma was ready to talk. She watched as Emma made work of her meal. It was odd, watching Emma eat so slowly, since she always ate like whatever meal she was eating could be her last, and being that she grew up in the foster system, it made perfect sense. They didn't talk about that part of Emma's life often. It was a bit of a sore subject, and Ruby respected that. She knew that the conversation they were going to have tonight was going to be in the same vein.

"We fucked in her office."

It was a whisper, very faint. If Ruby hadn't been waiting for it, she may have missed it. Emma didn't say anything else, and Ruby didn't prompt her to. Emma had said enough. After the two of them being apart for nearly six months, they'd broken their unspoken rule.

"She was being her usual ridiculously bossy self. She threatened to ban me from her classes, and I lost it Rubes. She's the department chair! That would ruin my major and she knew it. We've been playing this dangerous game for over a week now. Pushing each other's buttons but never going too far. Ruby, I don't know what came over me. I followed her into her office, and told her something. I can't even remember what. I only remember her saying something about having better, I said bullshit, and the next thing I know she's sitting on her desk, and I'm between her legs, and things are happening, Ruby. I was fucking her. I was touching her and kissing her, and fuck, it was amazing. And it shouldn't have been, Rubes. It should have been horrible. I shouldn't have done it. Then when she touched me, it felt like coming home. Like I was finally complete after feeling empty for months. Ruby, she misses me and she wants me to come back to her, and I want to. I really do, but I can't. Ruby, I can't."

Then she was sobbing. Her entire body shook with the ferocity of her emotions as they came crashing down over her. Ruby wrapped her arms around Emma and pulled her close, allowing her to lie down in her lap. She stroked her hair and just let Emma cry. She knew that was what the other woman needed.

Ruby hadn't been around for the breakup between Emma and Regina. She actually had been one of the many who had fallen for the _Emma Swan charm_ post break-up. After leaving Regina, Emma became something of a real life Shane McCutcheon. She frequented the local bars and the local club, meeting girls to go home with. She didn't go home with guys. Something about that just didn't work for her, until she met Graham, but he was a special case and the only one. Her rules when it came to women were quite simple: she never stayed the night, she never brought them to her home, and she wasn't big on being with the same woman twice. Well, Ruby was never a big fan of rules.

_Emma walked into the bar down the street from the University at half past eleven. She was dressed in a pair of skinny jeans and a white shirt, with her red leather jacket over that, and a pair of boots to top it all off. She noticed a few familiar faces but ignored them; they knew how it worked. She moved towards the bar and ordered a beer._

_"On the hunt, Emma?" She smiled and winked at Lacey, the bartender, while she took a swig of beer. The woman smiled and shook her head as Emma surveyed the crowd. "All these broken hearts are good for business, but you know, if the night doesn't go the way you plan…"_

_Emma turned and gave Lacey a sexy smirk, "I don't bite the hand that feeds me, Lace." _

_Lacey leaned across the bar and licked her lips, "A little biting never hurt anybody."_

_Emma shook her head, and Lacey sighed and helped another customer, "Can't blame a girl for trying."_

_Emma turned her attention back to the crowd. There was a small dance floor in the center of the room, and there was a girl in a tiny red skirt and tight white shirt that Emma zeroed in on._

_"And another one bites the dust," Lacey muttered, as Emma made her way towards the dance floor._

_She encountered a few past exploits but didn't linger; she was on a mission. The dark haired, leggy female was currently dancing with a blonde guy, but Emma didn't care. She watched and waited, biding her time, and sure enough, two songs later, he left the dance floor en route to the bar. Emma made her way swiftly towards the brunette, who was swaying to the music by herself. Emma slid in behind her, put her hands on the brunette's hips and rocked with her._

_"Is he your boyfriend?" Emma asked, as she grinded with the long legged woman who simply chuckled and rolled her eyes._

_"Do you honestly care?"_

_Emma paused for dramatic effect. "Not particularly, no."_

_"Didn't think so, but no, he's just some guy who's been buying me drinks, hoping to get lucky, but he's barking up the wrong tree."_

_Emma mentally patted herself on the back for making the right call, not that she'd never been with a straight girl, but she really wasn't up for that challenge tonight._

_The woman turned in her arms and was now looking at Emma. "I'm Ruby."_

_"Emma."_

_Ruby looked her up and down and bit her lip. She rocked her hips against the woman and smirked, "Nice to meet you, Emma."_

_"The pleasure is all mine."_

_The blonde haired guy came back to see Ruby wrapped around a woman, but that didn't deter him. He walked up to them and handed Ruby her drink, then moved behind her and continued to dance. Emma raised her eyebrow at Ruby and Ruby rolled her eyes. She allowed the sandwich to happen, herself facing Emma with the male counterpart at her back. Ruby honestly didn't mind the attention, but Emma was a woman on a mission._

_She turned Ruby in her arms so that now the brunette's back was against Emma's chest. Emma placed her right hand on Ruby's bare stomach and held her close against her. She rocked her hips against Ruby's ass and began nibbling on her earlobe. She would, every now and then, flick her tongue out and run it up and down Ruby's neck. The woman was quickly turning to putty in Emma's arms._

_She turned leaned close to the guy's ear, "I need to freshen up. I'll be right back." He looked up at her with a coy smirk and Ruby had to refrain from rolling her eyes. She grabbed Emma's hand and pulled her towards the bathroom._

_"So Emma, do you always come here to pick up girls? I've seen you in here a few times, but you always leave with a different woman. "_

_Emma had the decency to blush. "I'm a woman with a healthy appetite, and I don't think there's anything wrong with it. Men do it all the time, and no, I don't always come here to pick up girls." Emma paused. "I go to the club over on Main St. sometimes."_

_"Well lucky for you, I too have a rather healthy appetite."_

_The door to the bathroom opened and Ruby pulled Emma inside. She turned the lock on the door and felt Emma behind her, breath caressing her ear. She turned to face the blonde woman and kissed her._

_Emma pushed Ruby against the wall and pinned her there with her own body, allowing her tongue to seduce the taller girl. Ruby moaned in her mouth and rolled her body against Emma. Her body felt like it was buzzing, and she needed to be touched, badly._

_"Emma…" Ruby breathed her name against pale lips. She shuddered when she felt one of Emma's hands slip beneath her skirt. She waited with baited breath as she felt Emma's fingers tease the moistened material of her underwear. Ruby groaned when Emma took her bottom lip between her teeth as she slipped two fingers inside._

_Ruby allowed her head to fall back against the wall, and a deep groan rumbled in her chest. She lifted her leg and Emma grabbed it, holding it against her side in order to gain better access. Emma released Ruby's lip and moved to her tanned throat. She swirled her tongue on the soft skin there as she moved her fingers faster inside the brunette._

_Ruby's mind was reeling, she was trying to keep the orgasm at bay, Emma's fingers had to be magical because she had never been on the verge of coming so quickly in all her life. She gripped Emma's shoulders, and squealed when she felt her clit being teased, she couldn't hold it back any longer. A tremor ran down her spine and she growled Emma's name as she came._

_Emma held her and stroked her gently as her body began to descend its peak. Ruby's eyes were closed and her head was resting against the wall. She ran her tongue over chapped lips before opening her eyes and staring into emerald ones._

_"Come home with me"_

_They left the bathroom and there was a line of women outside waiting. Ruby had the courtesy to whisper an apology while Emma ignored the glares._

_"This isn't Better Than Chocolate, I need to pee." Emma rolled her eyes at the angry redhead and rolled her eyes. "Whatever Natasha, you know how it is." Emma winked at her and followed Ruby towards the exit. Lacey chuckled as she watched Emma and Ruby make their way towards the door. Out of the corner of her eye she saw the blonde man who had been with Ruby earlier make his way to the two of them, she grinned and grabbed a beer to enjoy the show._

_"Hey, where you going?" He grabbed Ruby's arm and Emma glared at him. Ruby tried to snatch her arm away but his grip was firm._

_"Let me go."_

_"We can add a third person to this party, why don't I join you." Emma took a step closer to him and grabbed his wrist. She squeezed it until he let go of Ruby's arm, "She's leaving with me."_

_"Come on now, you can share."_

_Emma stepped in front of Ruby and glared at the guy standing in her line of vision. She squared her shoulders and took a deep breath. "I don't share. Now you need to back off before I make you, and I'm sure you don't want me to embarrass you in front of all these women." She raised her eyebrow for emphasis and he backed off mumbling something incomprehensible._

_Emma turned towards Ruby and motioned towards the door. She threw her hand up waving bye to Lacey who smiled and shook her head. "When will they learn"_

_Once they were outside away from the bar Ruby spoke up, "I drove, so um… you can just follow me…..and um…thanks for handling that."_

_"Not a problem."_

_She got in her a car and followed Ruby to her apartment. She looked at her phone and saw that it was a nearing 1am, she knew she wouldn't get home until near 3am. She shrugged, she didn't class have tomorrow she'd sleep in._

_They pulled up to a three-story apartment building and she parked next to Ruby's car. She got out the car and followed the brunette to the gate, looking away when Ruby put in the code to open the gate. Once the gate was open Emma followed the brunette to her door._

_Emma stood entirely too close to her and Ruby was having trouble getting the key in the door. Emma smirked and began kissing her neck. She placed her hands on slender hips as she continued her ministrations. Emma could feel Ruby trying to keep her breathing at a normal rate and decided to spare the woman for now, she eased up on her neck allowing Ruby to finally get the key in the door._

_Ruby pushed the door open and walked in with Emma right behind her. She tossed her keys on the table and moved towards her bedroom. She moved towards her night stand and turned on the lamp there. _

_Emma slowly pulled her jacket off and tossed it in a chair near the door. She reached out and grabbed Ruby around the waist. They stood there, like that for a moment before Emma hoisted her up and carried her towards the bed. She kissed the woman in her arms as she lowered them to the bed. Emma's kisses moved south; down Ruby's throat, over her heaving breast, down to a bare midriff. She pushed the fabric of Ruby's shirt up and kissed the skin that was exposed. Her movements were slow and teasing as she moved up, her lips falling between supple breasts._

_Ruby's breathing was jagged and labored as she enjoyed how Emma's tongue and lips felt against her flushed skin. Her back arched off the bed when Emma's lips wrapped around her taut nipple. She looked down to see as mess of blond hair as Emma worked her into a frenzy._

_As Emma began to once again work her way down Ruby's body, the brunette squirmed with need. Emma smirked against her skin and decided not to tease the woman beneath her. She pulled both her skirt and underwear off at the same time and wasted no time._

_Ruby scrambled to gain her bearings as she felt Emma's tongue in the most intimate of places. Emma's tongue was very experienced and brought Ruby to the edge faster than expected. Ruby's hips bucked and thrashed and she held out, wanting the feeling to last longer. She tangled her fingers in messy blonde curls and grinded against Emma's face. Her moans bounced off the walls as she fought to hold out a bit longer. But when Emma lightly scrapped her teeth over Ruby's clit, the brunette couldn't control her orgasm any longer._

_After the first one, Ruby's orgasm's came with fervor. She lost count of how many times Emma brought her to her peak. It was a blur of fingers, tongues and teeth. A cacophony of breathy moans, gruttal groans, and names bouncing off the walls of Ruby's bedroom. Legs tangled together, arms wound around one another, bodies slick with sweat as their bodies trembled and shuddered, before sleep over took them both._

_And it was when Emma awoke, to the smell of bacon and in a bedroom that wasn't her own, that she knew that she'd fucked up in the best of ways._

And after the awkwardness of breaking one of her rules wore off she allowed Ruby in and a friendship flourished from sex. And soon Emma was opening up to Ruby about her life, it felt natural for them both. They trusted each other with everything. That's why Emma was comfortable breaking down in Ruby's lap without feeling weak and vulnerable.

"I told her I still loved her, it hurts being away from her. Ruby you know better than everyone what this did to me. I don't know what to do. I applied for an independent study, I couldn't be in class with her. I couldn't be in her presence after what we did. I can't look at her and know that I'm keeping us apart—"

"It is not your fault that you and Regina aren't together. Honey, she did this to you guys. You did not ruin the relationship. Everything happened for a reason. Emma I know you love her and I know that she was and is your everything but obviously you aren't ready to forgive and move forward."

"I want to move on, I want to pick up my phone and call her and tell her it's fine and I'm over it and I want us to start over. Ruby, she's still everywhere. Her photo is still on my fucking phone, I still wear the necklace she bought me, I still have the ticket stub to the last movie we saw together. I still have all the text messages we sent back and forth. I still have the voicemail from the day before our life fell apart when she told me she missed me in class and she loved me and she'd come over after her office hours were over. I want to move forward! I just don't know how to let it go."

And she broke down again. The sight of Emma so torn up and inconsolable was painful to witness. She was so strong and tough, but when it came to Regina she was reduced to this; a women with a broken heart. A woman who was lost and alone and needing the one person who she didn't know how to have.

* * *

So for those who don't like the whole Red Swan thing, Emma and Ruby met at a bar, Sexy times ensue in the bathroom, there is a _Better than Chocolate _reference, then they go back to Ruby's house and more sexy times. And then friendship, that's the jist of the flashback. So yea...please review and give me your thoughts. K, love you bye.


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